Speaking Acceptably in the King’s Presence
1.
Debate and Disclose Wisely
2.
Give the Fit Word that Refreshes Souls
Proverbs
25:6-13 Do not put yourself forward in the king's presence or stand in the
place of the great, 7 for it is better to be told, "Come up here,"
than to be put lower in the presence of a noble. What your eyes have seen 8 do
not hastily bring into court, for what will you do in the end, when your
neighbor puts you to shame? 9 Argue your case with your neighbor himself, and
do not reveal another's secret, 10 lest he who hears you bring shame upon you,
and your ill repute have no end. 11 A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold
in a setting of silver. 12 Like a gold ring or an ornament of gold is a wise
reprover to a listening ear. 13 Like the cold of snow in the time of harvest is
a faithful messenger to those who send him; he refreshes the soul of his
masters. (ESV).
Recently
I've been seeing a lot of ads on the Internet for a software service called Grammarly.
Apparently, this program is a way to check your spelling and grammar as you’re
working on your computer. The technology itself is really nothing new, I
suppose. Microsoft Word and other word processing programs have had various
spell checkers and grammar checkers. You’re probably familiar, as I am, with
the red squiggly line or the blue squiggly line underneath the text. But as
communication becomes more digital there is certainly a great necessity for programs
like these that can work well and can be fluid.
Grammar
and spelling mistakes have always been a pet peeve of mine. It's difficult for
me to read something or to take something seriously if it's filled with errors.
It bothers some people more than others, but it certainly can become an issue
when you're trying to convey something that is very important.
Today
we talk about a portion of the Bible that deals with communication. In these
verses that were recorded by King Solomon in the book of Proverbs under the
inspiration of the Holy Spirit God is telling us how to speak in the presence
of the king. These words applied to Solomon’s experiences, but we’re not before
Solomon or any other earthly king today. We’re before the King of heaven and
earth – and the ruler of all righteousness. Now wouldn't it be something if God
could help our communication out the way that a word processor works. Could you
imagine if God would put a template around the false things we say or the times
we take something out of context. That's probably the type of communication
checker that most people don't want to have in life because we
would simply be awestruck at the amount of problems with the way that we talk.
It
seems like this wisdom from God in His word today from the book of Proverbs
probably applies to our culture more than any other. We're familiar with the
old saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.”
Now sticks and stones certainly can do a lot of damage to our bodies but very
often it is words themselves that hurt more. It's words that cause deep
emotional pain. It's words that cause people to feel like they're unloved. It's
words that can cast doubt in a person's heart and mind and can grow into a
devastating terror from which they feel helpless.
We
get the point of that saying but words certainly hurt a lot. And in a day and
age when we’re protected from most bodily dangers, we're really not protected
all that well from hurtful words. Communication has always been an important
thing for God because it's the very process through which He delivers to us the
message of salvation in Jesus Christ. Words before the King carry and eternal
impact. In Romans chapter 10 Paul talks about how the Gospel message is
delivered through one who preaches and if someone doesn't step up and use words
and preach Christ no one is going to come to faith. So, God, as both King and
Savior, takes our use of words very seriously.
Few
people today practice what God talks about here. Just this week in the sports
world alone I can think of 3 separate controversies that developed, that became
news headlines, revolving around something someone said or the way in which
they said it that was either wrong or caused hurt to someone else.
Even
outside of mere sports, our culture elevates the freedom of speech to one of
the highest freedoms – even portraying it as a moral right. Yet, do we consider
whether God gives us the right to say something as much as we consider our
national rights. There are consequences that come along with saying whatever we
want. And as much as we promote freedom of speech, Christian values and truth
are regularly suppressed, and individual Christians are often strongly
encouraged to keep quiet about their faith.
Learning
how to properly speak before God is a necessary skill – but it’s also
life-giving; just as Solomon writes, God’s wisdom is like the cooling effect of
snow on a sweltering hot day. And in this way God’s guidance can be summarized
from this section of Proverbs in two categories:
1. Debate and Disclose
Wisely
2. Give the Fit Word
that Refreshes Souls
Most
of the time words hurt when they’re paired with deep emotion, and there are few
emotions deeper than anger. Words of anger can be extremely damaging. When
words cause great riffs in relationships or when they cause people to feel ways
about their lives that God does not feel about them - as if their worthless or
insignificant - it's often because those words are accompanied by anger. For
this reason our culture has often taken the stance of using our words in a non-judgmental
way or a non-criticizing way. There are good reasons for this approach, yet
even we selectively choose when to judge and when not to. Some contexts are
treated differently than others. Even the most non-judgmental people have times
when their language is filled with anger.
God
makes clear that the proper way to speak before the King is determined in His
word. We see in verse 9 that there is a time to argue your case with your
neighbor. But to so by not reveal another person’s secrets. God tells us that
there is a proper time to bring emotion into our words - even the emotion of
anger when we argue and debate something. There are plenty of checks and
balances as well. God says don't go hastily to court. Don't let your words of
emotion be given without thinking. Don't trample on somebody else's reputation,
or air their dirty laundry out in the public just because you're upset about
something.
Being
a Christian doesn’t mean you have to concede every matter of importance in your
life. The world doesn’t even follow it’s own argument of never making judgments
or criticisms. If we follow that we’ll never stand for Christ – we’ll never
speak of our heavenly King. There is a time and a place to debate but it is to
be done in Christian love and respect for God and for our neighbor. As King
Solomon certainly would have heard many complaints from the people that he
ruled, of which we have an example with the two women contending that the same
child was their own. Solomon exercised wisdom and discernment to figure out who
the real mother was. What Solomon warns about in coming to the King with your
case is in not having your argument come from the truth. Don’t let emotion rule
your heart. If someone simply brings an argument of anger out of emotion
they're going to be proven wrong and they're going to be shown to be foolish.
No one wants to be in that situation, especially before the King.
The
lesson for us is that in God’s presence, we cannot speak truth without using
His Word. This is a welcome piece of advice from God in our day and age when
communication can be something as simple as a tapping your phone or clicking on
your computer. You tend to lose the element of shame of being wrong when you
anonymously offer your opinion to the world. It’s easy to ride emotion when
you’re looking at a screen and not a person. These verses remind us that we are
always before God, the King, and we should speak appropriately.
Another
form of speech that leads to sin is when we feel like we need to win the
argument or get the last word. That attitude alone shows that we’re not
invested in standing for the truth or building up our neighbor. It even shows a
glaring inconsistency of being willing to sacrifice the truth in order to get
our argument across in any circumstance. Rather than contend with just our own
opinions God offers the advice of seeking the “word fitly spoken.” This word of
verse 11 talks about not only the fit context but also the fit approach. The
proper word that truly glorifies God and serves our neighbor is going to be
spoken at the right time but it's also going to say the right thing.
This
word fitly spoken is portrayed as a beautiful thing in the text, as an
ornamental apple in settings of silver and as a gold ring that is used for
decoration and beauty. Notice how the word fitly spoken is not about just
saying things that are positive to our ears. The individual who delivers this
beautiful message is called the “wise reprover” in our text. It's concerning a
word of rebuke - a message of repentance and a call to discard the evil and
vileness of the human heart because of sin. The beauty of a Word to God is not
about what the culture has to say about it or what sounds reassuring and
positive to our ears but it's a word that builds up and sustains God’s message.
This is acceptable to our King and it’s the true path to communication that can
refresh the soul. That message can be one of repentance or it can be one of
promise.
The
message of repentance and forgiveness is focused on the Savior – the Prince of
Peace who was sent by the King. There is no better word to share than one that
speaks Christ. It doesn't just have to be a recitation of a gospel passage or a
part of a confession that speaks the good news of salvation. Speaking Christ
can be part of our everyday speech. Christ can be in the various and different
topics that we discuss from day to day. Speaking Christ influences the way that
you talk to others even when you have a disagreement with them. Speaking Christ
is always invested in an individual’s eternal soul care and it's not just about
what they want to hear in this world. There is no better word.
It
was during that tumultuous time in Jesus ministry when he was tested in this
very regard. In John chapter 6 the Holy Spirit tells us that many people, even
among His own followers, were offended that Jesus declared Himself to be the
only Savior. Because of that message from Jesus which we know today as the
gospel, John recorded that many of Jesus’ disciples went back and walked with Him
no more. And Jesus said to the 12, “Do you also want to go away?” Simon Peter
responded “Lord to whom shall we go, You have the words of eternal life? also
we have come to know and believe that you are the Christ the son of the living
God.”
Jesus’
12 disciples were living examples of the power of God's communication in His
word. Peter recognized that they were in the presence of the Savior King. Believers
are always a testament to the confidence and certainty that a word fitly spoken
about Jesus can have. But the disciples who fell away also a reminder to us of
how sharp that division is in connection with God’s Word and how we use and
receive it.
We
face many trials today when it comes to the way that we talk with others. It's
hard enough to wrestle with an inborn sinful human nature that wants to tear
others apart with the way that we speak in think. As James writes, the tongue
is indeed an awful enemy that cannot be tamed by human effort. We also live in
a world that distorts communication values under the guise of freedom of
speech. It’s a tough ground to navigate as a child of God. What a comfort that
God does not abandon us to these fates. He offers us real advice on how to
speak to one another. He makes the standards of communication and the
difference between right and wrong clear.
And
most important of all, He is able to refresh our souls with the most fit word
of life and forgiveness in His Son, Jesus. May we recognize that we speak in
the presence of the King, and the responsibility and privilege that comes along
with that. God grant you faithfulness and grace to use the word fitly spoken
about your Savior, to lead your way and to refresh your soul. Amen.
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